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Sunday, February 8, 2015

Crazy, Exhausted

This weekend was a great one.  We had a reprieve from the Kansas winter and Mother Nature blessed us with a 70 degree day yesterday and a 60+ day today.  We were busy.  We celebrated a couple's upcoming nuptials on Friday night, worked out, ran errands, Rick took my stepdaughter to the new Spongebob movie, went to the park, and hung out by our friends' firepit on Saturday night, and then today was a blur of church, park picnic, Boat and Outdoor show (where we had a fortuitous meeting with former Royals players Dennis Leonard and Tom Bruno), and zoo before coming home.

Packed weekends are fun, but totally and utterly exhausting.  We ran around like crazy and now I desperately want to crash early in my bed.  However, I cannot.  Why?  Because in the midst of all the crazy, we didn't get much time to do what needed to be done.

Laundry was piled up, dishes scattered about, cats whining to be fed (at least one), and groceries to be shopped for.  We have nothing in the house to bring to work for lunches for the week and we ate out for both lunch and dinner.  I was so hungry earlier I felt like puking and then scarfing down a Sonic bacon cheeseburger certainly didn't help.  Now I feel worse!

I'm bloated and cranky, frustrated with transitioning my cats to wet food and trying to get them to eat out of separate bowls.  I am overwhelmed with all that needs to be done and in the midst of all of this, I snapped because my hubby was hogging the wi-fi and I couldn't finish a game of Trivia Crack.  I yelled at my stepson because he left the empty cans of cat food on the counter in the kitchen and didn't rinse them out and my cat tried to jump up there and clean them out.  I got frustrated with both of the kids because they didn't rinse the dishes before they stuck them in the dishwasher and so now several dishes have stuck on food.  

What do you do when crazy meets exhausted and you are so worn out you can barely breathe?

The kids are back with their mothers and here I sit, contemplating just going to bed, knowing I can't, because my husband is going to ignore the laundry and watch The Walking Dead instead.  That's totally fine, but I can't even enjoy that with him anymore.

My anxiety creeps up at night and especially when I watch any kind of 'intense' programming.  So I made the decision to forego the rest of the season to keep myself (relatively) sane.

I've been needing to write a post since Tuesday and can't find anything to write about.  The weekend was so busy, it distracted me from this, but has also kept me from centering myself again before work tomorrow.  I just want to scream sometimes.  My exhaustion overwhelms me and makes me wonder if it contributes to my crazy, or if it's the other way 'round.

SERENITY NOW!!!  Serenity now.

Here I sit, half asleep, wondering if the groceries will magically appear.  Probably not, but I know one thing.  I'm not getting them.  I think I'm going to finish up the laundry and read in bed instead.


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